What a fantastic Christmas! Got some great presents had great family time. Just all and all a very fantastic holiday.

Except for that looming cloud that is the fact that I wasn't with my family. Not for Thanksgiving and not for Christmas. and it is hard. But the fact of the matter is that Simon is my family now and I just have to get used to it. It is not one of those bad things to get used to it is just new. I mean I made the choice to move 2000 miles away from my family because I had to get away. I had to cut the ties and just try it but now there is another twist.

My brother wants to try it too. Except I've already done it. I've set it all up and now he wants to go for it too. BUT it isnt the same. I've cleared a path. I've already done the struggle up river with no paddle! I've been, I saw, I conquered! And now you just want to show up and do it too, well of course. I mean what am I supposed to say??? no??? the kid has just finished the next chapter that is the school of hard knocks. I mean give the kid a freaking break. But there were reasons I came to London and I dont think they are the same for him and that is hard to deal with.

But I made a promise to my little brother and I will not go back on it. I mean it is family after all.